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‘וְלִבְכֹּתָהּ’ – “and he wept for her” (Chayei Sarah 23:2)

The Baal Haturim says that there is a small ‘כּ to explain that he only cried a bit because she was old.

The Bikurei Avraham asks, ‘How this can be the explanation of וְלִבְכֹּתָהּ’?  The Torah is emphasizing that he only cried a bit for his deceased wife – is this a praise of Avraham?!

Furthermore, this was Sarah Imeinu – whilst Avraham converted many people, it was she who converted all the women, she was a great prophetess of her own right, she was the first of the matriarchs, all of whom experienced regular miracles. In an instant this was lost – was it not necessary to weep without end at the loss of such an important person? At the passing of both Moshe and Aharon at the ages of 120 and 123 respectively, the entire nation had a 30 day mourning period – how are we to understand that Avraham did not greatly mourn his wife?

In truth, the Torah is trying to tell us what a special and unique person Avraham Avinu was. When he got back from the Akeida, he found his wife had passed, and knew it had happened when she’d heard about the Akeida – ‘ונסמכה מיתת שרה לעקידת יצחק’ (Rashi 23:2)
The way the Yetzer Hara works is that he doesn’t just dissuade us from trying to do something – he approaches us even after we’ve achieved our goal. He tried to manipulate Avraham into regretting the Akeida that was the cause of his wife’s death.

What Avraham did was distance himself from such thoughts – he justified her death to himself  (refer to the above quote from the Ba’al Haturim) by saying her time had come to die anyway because ‘she was old’. The fact that the Torah publicized that he wept briefly for his deceased wife is indeed a huge praise for Avraham.

This methodology used by the Yetzer Hara – discourage from performing, bad intentions while performing, haughtiness or regret after – all cause a person to forfeit any reward due for performing Mitzvahs. It has no value in G-D’s eyes, since it has no value in man’s eyes. This is what we pray for in Ma’ariv every day when we say “v’hoser satan milfaneinu” (“before us [our action] and after us”).

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In Parshas Chukas, 19:2, it says: זֹאת חֻקַּת הַתּוֹרָה אֲשֶׁר צִוָּה יְ־הֹוָ־ה לֵאמֹר דַּבֵּר אֶל בְּנֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל וְיִקְחוּ אֵלֶיךָ פָרָה אֲדֻמָּה תְּמִימָה אֲשֶׁר אֵין בָּהּ מוּם אֲשֶׁר לֹא עָלָה עָלֶיהָ עֹל - This is the statute of the Torah which the Lord commanded, saying, Speak to the children of Israel and have them take for you a perfectly red unblemished cow, upon which no yoke was laid.

Rashi states, זאת חקת התורה: לפי שהשטן ואומות העולם מונין את ישראל לומר מה המצוה הזאת ומה טעם יש בה, לפיכך כתב בה חקה, גזירה היא מלפני ואין לך רשות להרהר אחריה-  This is the statute of the Torah: Because the Satan and the nations of the world will taunt the Jews and ask the Jews about their commandments and subsequent purposes.  Therefore, the Torah uses the term decree. I have decreed it; you have no right to challenge it.

This answer seems to imply that there is no reason for this commandment of Parah Admuah; we simply keep it out of blind faith. Rashi 19:22 states in the name of Rabbi Moshe HaDarshan that it atones for the sin of eigel (the golden calf). We are left with a question; is it a chok or to atone for eigel?

The Bikurei Avraham and Kehilas Yitzchak answer that all the different explanations for Parah Adumah (the red heifer) conclude that it atones for eigel, precisely because Parah Adumah has no reason. The sin of eigel was that the Jews threw off the yoke of heaven, so the equal and opposite would be to accept the yoke of heaven despite not knowing the reason.  Thus, both answers ring true - we don’t know the reason for Parah Adumah, and that’s why it atones for eigel.

The Panim Yafos says that the Gemara (Brachos 55a) writes that recalling a previous sin reopens the investigation and it comes under scrutiny again to some degree. This is what the nations of the world and the Satan accomplish when they ask whats the Parah Adumah is for. They know its because of the eigel; therefore we say it’s a chok.
R’ Chaim of Alexander writes that the pasuk says “leimor” (saying) twice-  וַיְדַבֵּר הֹ אֶל מֹשֶׁה וְאֶל אַהֲרֹן לֵאמֹר (And Hashem said to Moshe and Ahron saying) and זֹאת חֻקַּת הַתּוֹרָה אֲשֶׁר צִוָּה הֹ לֵאמֹר (These are the decrees of the Torah that Hashem commanded, saying).  He explains that it is so because of the two answers. If the nations of the world and the Satan ask, its a chok. If Rabbi Moshe Hadarshan is asking, then we have a great reason.

ראש חודש ניסן

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